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Thursday 12 February 2015
Race Bigots, Political Correctness & Your Stock Portfolio... | SHOCKING STATS on ZOMBIE foreclosures | [Scam of the Day] GHOST OFFER couple busted in California | do THESE CITIES house modern-day DEBTORS' PRISONS? | FAKE TAX RETURN TSUNAMI much more...
SHOCKING STATS on ZOMBIE foreclosures | [Scam of the Day] GHOST OFFER
couple busted in California | do THESE CITIES house modern-day
DEBTORS' PRISONS? | FAKE TAX RETURN TSUNAMI much more...
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Bryan Ellis Investing Letter <bryan@bryanellis.com>
Date: Thu, 12 Feb 2015 14:00:08 +0000
Subject: Race Bigots, Political Correctness & Your Stock Portfolio...
| SHOCKING STATS on ZOMBIE foreclosures | [Scam of the Day] GHOST
OFFER couple busted in California | do THESE CITIES house modern-day
DEBTORS' PRISONS? | FAKE TAX RETURN TSUNAMI much more...
To: Uguba Ndubuisi <ugubandubuisi@gmail.com>
[image: Please Display Images To Enjoy All Of Today's Newsletter!]
Bryan Ellis
Race Bigots, Political Correctness & Your Stock Portfolio... |
SHOCKING STATS on ZOMBIE foreclosures | [Scam of the Day] GHOST OFFER
couple busted in California | do THESE CITIES house modern-day
DEBTORS' PRISONS? | FAKE TAX RETURN TSUNAMI much more...
[image: Please Display Images To Enjoy All Of Today's Newsletter!]
February 12, 2015
"Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it."
- Henry Thoreau -
[image: Self Directed Investor Radio with Bryan Ellis -- PLEASE Display Images!]
Today On
Self-Directed Investor Radio:
Race Bigots, Political Correctness... And The Damage They Cause To
YOUR Stock Portfolio
Quick Tip
Get Your "Fiber": These days, buyers cannot resist the allure of a
[continue here]
This Week's Highlights!
·
SHOCKING STATS on ZOMBIE foreclosures
·
[Scam of the Day] GHOST OFFER couple busted in California
·
Government & Politics: FAKE TAX RETURN TSUNAMI
·
Personal Finance: do THESE CITIES house modern-day DEBTORS' PRISONS?
Current Full Issue Is Here
Thank you for being a subscriber to the Bryan Ellis Investing Letter.
This letter is sent on behalf of Galt Ragnar LLLP and is for
educational purposes only. We're not providing legal, tax, accounting
or other professional advice. If that's what you need, please seek
the services of a licensed professional. Some of the links in this
email may lead to products/services for sale for which Galt Ragnar
LLLP will be compensated, so use your own independent judgment at all
times. Nothing in this email is intended to form a contract or
binding legal commitment. All content herein is copyright (c) 2015
Galt Ragnar LLLP. By responding to this email in writing (via email
or otherwise), you are authorizing Galt Ragnar LLLP to publish your
name and any or all of your comments without compensation to you.
COI Publishing LLC, 1720 Mars Hill Road Suite 8-261, Acworth, GA
30101, United States
You may unsubscribe or change your contact details at any time.
[image: open]
--
authorized Signatory from uguba ndubuisi
Wednesday 22 June 2022
There is an overdue payment under your name. Please, settle your debts ASAP!
Sadly, there are some bad news that you are about to hear.
About few months ago I have gained a full access to all devices used by you for internet browsing.
Shortly after, I started recording all internet activities done by you.
Below is the sequence of events of how that happened:
Earlier I purchased from hackers a unique access to diversified email accounts (at the moment, it is really easy to do using internet).
As you can see, I managed to log in to your email account without breaking a sweat: (ugubandubuisi.uguba@blogger.com).
Within one week afterwards, I installed a Trojan virus in your Operating Systems available on all devices that you utilize for logging in your email.
To be frank, it was somewhat a very easy task (since you were kind enough to open some of links provided in your inbox emails).
I know, you may be thinking now that I'm a genius.
With help of that useful software, I am now able to gain access to all the controllers located in your devices (e.g., video camera, keyboard, microphone and others).
As result, managed to download all your photos, personal data, history of web browsing and other info to my servers without any problems.
Moreover, I now have access to all accounts in your messengers, social networks, emails, contacts list, chat history - you name it.
My Trojan virus continues refreshing its signatures in a non-stop manner (because it is operated by driver),
hence it remains undetected by any antivirus software installed in your PC or device.
So, I guess now you finally understand the reason why I could never be caught until this very letter...
During the process of your personal info compilation, I could not help but notice that you are a huge admirer and regular guest of websites with adult content.
You endure a lot of pleasure while checking out porn websites, watching nasty porn movies and reaching breathtaking orgasms.
Let me be frank with you, it was really hard to resist from recording some of those naughty solo scenes with you in main role and compiling them in special videos
that expose your masturbation sessions, which end with you cumming.
In case if you still have doubts, all I need is to click my mouse and all those nasty videos with you will be shared to friends, colleagues, and relatives of yours.
Moreover, nothing stops me from uploading all that hot content online, so all public can watch it too.
I sincerely hope, you would really not prefer that to happen, keeping in mind all the dirty things you like to watch,
(you certainly know what I mean) it will completely ruin your reputation.
However, don't worry, there is still a way to resolve this:
You need to carry out a $1290 USD transfer to my wallet (equivalent amount in bitcoins depending on exchange rate at the moment of funds transfer),
hence upon receiving the transaction, I will proceed with deleting all the filthy videos with you in main role.
Afterwards, we can forget about this unpleasant accident. Furthermore, I guarantee that all the malicious software will also be erased from your devices and accounts.
Mark my words, I never lie.
That is a great bargain with a low price, I assure you, because I have spent a lot of effort while recording
and tracking down all your activities and dirty deeds during a long period of time.
In case if you have no idea how to buy and transfer bitcoins - feel free to check the related info on the internet.
Here is my bitcoin wallet for your reference: 1Mjt2xobFExdZBGfjTVDcgzJWQxRxoHBdA
From now on, you have only 48 hours and countdown has started once you opened this very email (in other words, 2 days).
The following list contains things you should definitely abstain from doing or even attempting:
> Abstain from trying to reply this email (since the email is generated inside your inbox alongside with return address).
> Abstain from trying to call or report to police or any other security services. In addition, it's a bad idea if you want to share it with your friends,
hoping they would help. If I happen to find out (knowing my awesome skills, it can be done effortlessly,
because I have all your devices and accounts under my control and unceasing observation) - kinky videos of yours will be share to public the same day.
> Abstain from trying to look for me - that would not lead anywhere either. Cryptocurrency transactions are absolutely anonymous and cannot be tracked.
> Abstain from reinstalling your OS on devices or throwing them away. That would not solve the problem as well,
since all your personal videos are already uploaded and stored at remote servers.
Things you may be confused about:
> That your funds transfer won't be delivered to me.
Chill, I can track down any transactions right away, so upon funds transfer I will receive a notification as well,
since I still control your devices (my trojan virus has ability of controlling all processes remotely, just like TeamViewer).
> That I am going to share your dirty videos after receiving money transfer from you.
Here you need to trust me, because there is absolutely no point to still bother you after receiving money.
Moreover, if I really wanted all those videos would be available to public long time ago!
I believe we can still handle this situation on fair terms!
Here is my last advice to you... in future you better ensure you stay away from this kind of situations!
My advice - don't forget to regularly update your passwords to feel completely secure.
Thursday 23 June 2022
There is an overdue payment under your name. Please, settle your debts ASAP!
Sadly, there are some bad news that you are about to hear.
About few months ago I have gained a full access to all devices used by you for internet browsing.
Shortly after, I started recording all internet activities done by you.
Below is the sequence of events of how that happened:
Earlier I purchased from hackers a unique access to diversified email accounts (at the moment, it is really easy to do using internet).
As you can see, I managed to log in to your email account without breaking a sweat: (ugubandubuisi.uguba@blogger.com).
Within one week afterwards, I installed a Trojan virus in your Operating Systems available on all devices that you utilize for logging in your email.
To be frank, it was somewhat a very easy task (since you were kind enough to open some of links provided in your inbox emails).
I know, you may be thinking now that I'm a genius.
With help of that useful software, I am now able to gain access to all the controllers located in your devices (e.g., video camera, keyboard, microphone and others).
As result, managed to download all your photos, personal data, history of web browsing and other info to my servers without any problems.
Moreover, I now have access to all accounts in your messengers, social networks, emails, contacts list, chat history - you name it.
My Trojan virus continues refreshing its signatures in a non-stop manner (because it is operated by driver),
hence it remains undetected by any antivirus software installed in your PC or device.
So, I guess now you finally understand the reason why I could never be caught until this very letter...
During the process of your personal info compilation, I could not help but notice that you are a huge admirer and regular guest of websites with adult content.
You endure a lot of pleasure while checking out porn websites, watching nasty porn movies and reaching breathtaking orgasms.
Let me be frank with you, it was really hard to resist from recording some of those naughty solo scenes with you in main role and compiling them in special videos
that expose your masturbation sessions, which end with you cumming.
In case if you still have doubts, all I need is to click my mouse and all those nasty videos with you will be shared to friends, colleagues, and relatives of yours.
Moreover, nothing stops me from uploading all that hot content online, so all public can watch it too.
I sincerely hope, you would really not prefer that to happen, keeping in mind all the dirty things you like to watch,
(you certainly know what I mean) it will completely ruin your reputation.
However, don't worry, there is still a way to resolve this:
You need to carry out a $1290 USD transfer to my wallet (equivalent amount in bitcoins depending on exchange rate at the moment of funds transfer),
hence upon receiving the transaction, I will proceed with deleting all the filthy videos with you in main role.
Afterwards, we can forget about this unpleasant accident. Furthermore, I guarantee that all the malicious software will also be erased from your devices and accounts.
Mark my words, I never lie.
That is a great bargain with a low price, I assure you, because I have spent a lot of effort while recording
and tracking down all your activities and dirty deeds during a long period of time.
In case if you have no idea how to buy and transfer bitcoins - feel free to check the related info on the internet.
Here is my bitcoin wallet for your reference: 1Mjt2xobFExdZBGfjTVDcgzJWQxRxoHBdA
From now on, you have only 48 hours and countdown has started once you opened this very email (in other words, 2 days).
The following list contains things you should definitely abstain from doing or even attempting:
> Abstain from trying to reply this email (since the email is generated inside your inbox alongside with return address).
> Abstain from trying to call or report to police or any other security services. In addition, it's a bad idea if you want to share it with your friends,
hoping they would help. If I happen to find out (knowing my awesome skills, it can be done effortlessly,
because I have all your devices and accounts under my control and unceasing observation) - kinky videos of yours will be share to public the same day.
> Abstain from trying to look for me - that would not lead anywhere either. Cryptocurrency transactions are absolutely anonymous and cannot be tracked.
> Abstain from reinstalling your OS on devices or throwing them away. That would not solve the problem as well,
since all your personal videos are already uploaded and stored at remote servers.
Things you may be confused about:
> That your funds transfer won't be delivered to me.
Chill, I can track down any transactions right away, so upon funds transfer I will receive a notification as well,
since I still control your devices (my trojan virus has ability of controlling all processes remotely, just like TeamViewer).
> That I am going to share your dirty videos after receiving money transfer from you.
Here you need to trust me, because there is absolutely no point to still bother you after receiving money.
Moreover, if I really wanted all those videos would be available to public long time ago!
I believe we can still handle this situation on fair terms!
Here is my last advice to you... in future you better ensure you stay away from this kind of situations!
My advice - don't forget to regularly update your passwords to feel completely secure.
Saturday 2 July 2022
There is an overdue payment under your name. Please, settle your debts ASAP.
Sadly, there are some bad news that you are about to hear.
About few months ago I have gained a full access to all devices used by you for internet browsing.
Shortly after, I started recording all internet activities done by you.
Below is the sequence of events of how that happened:
Earlier I purchased from hackers a unique access to diversified email accounts (at the moment, it is really easy to do using internet).
As you can see, I managed to log in to your email account without breaking a sweat: (ugubandubuisi.uguba@blogger.com).
Within one week afterwards, I installed a Trojan virus in your Operating Systems available on all devices that you utilize for logging in your email.
To be frank, it was somewhat a very easy task (since you were kind enough to open some of links provided in your inbox emails).
I know, you may be thinking now that I'm a genius.
With help of that useful software, I am now able to gain access to all the controllers located in your devices (e.g., video camera, keyboard, microphone and others).
As result, managed to download all your photos, personal data, history of web browsing and other info to my servers without any problems.
Moreover, I now have access to all accounts in your messengers, social networks, emails, contacts list, chat history - you name it.
My Trojan virus continues refreshing its signatures in a non-stop manner (because it is operated by driver),
hence it remains undetected by any antivirus software installed in your PC or device.
So, I guess now you finally understand the reason why I could never be caught until this very letter...
During the process of your personal info compilation, I could not help but notice that you are a huge admirer and regular guest of websites with adult content.
You endure a lot of pleasure while checking out porn websites, watching nasty porn movies and reaching breathtaking orgasms.
Let me be frank with you, it was really hard to resist from recording some of those naughty solo scenes with you in main role and compiling them in special videos
that expose your masturbation sessions, which end with you cumming.
In case if you still have doubts, all I need is to click my mouse and all those nasty videos with you will be shared to friends, colleagues, and relatives of yours.
Moreover, nothing stops me from uploading all that hot content online, so all public can watch it too.
I sincerely hope, you would really not prefer that to happen, keeping in mind all the dirty things you like to watch,
(you certainly know what I mean) it will completely ruin your reputation.
However, don't worry, there is still a way to resolve this:
You need to carry out a $1290 USD transfer to my wallet (equivalent amount in bitcoins depending on exchange rate at the moment of funds transfer),
hence upon receiving the transaction, I will proceed with deleting all the filthy videos with you in main role.
Afterwards, we can forget about this unpleasant accident. Furthermore, I guarantee that all the malicious software will also be erased from your devices and accounts.
Mark my words, I never lie.
That is a great bargain with a low price, I assure you, because I have spent a lot of effort while recording
and tracking down all your activities and dirty deeds during a long period of time.
In case if you have no idea how to buy and transfer bitcoins - feel free to check the related info on the internet.
Here is my bitcoin wallet for your reference: 1LrBGezKti4m2cov7CKuurLnCfQvjp2o1A
From now on, you have only 48 hours and countdown has started once you opened this very email (in other words, 2 days).
The following list contains things you should definitely abstain from doing or even attempting:
> Abstain from trying to reply this email (since the email is generated inside your inbox alongside with return address).
> Abstain from trying to call or report to police or any other security services. In addition, it's a bad idea if you want to share it with your friends,
hoping they would help. If I happen to find out (knowing my awesome skills, it can be done effortlessly,
because I have all your devices and accounts under my control and unceasing observation) - kinky videos of yours will be share to public the same day.
> Abstain from trying to look for me - that would not lead anywhere either. Cryptocurrency transactions are absolutely anonymous and cannot be tracked.
> Abstain from reinstalling your OS on devices or throwing them away. That would not solve the problem as well,
since all your personal videos are already uploaded and stored at remote servers.
Things you may be confused about:
> That your funds transfer won't be delivered to me.
Chill, I can track down any transactions right away, so upon funds transfer I will receive a notification as well,
since I still control your devices (my trojan virus has ability of controlling all processes remotely, just like TeamViewer).
> That I am going to share your dirty videos after receiving money transfer from you.
Here you need to trust me, because there is absolutely no point to still bother you after receiving money.
Moreover, if I really wanted all those videos would be available to public long time ago!
I believe we can still handle this situation on fair terms!
Here is my last advice to you... in future you better ensure you stay away from this kind of situations!
My advice - don't forget to regularly update your passwords to feel completely secure.
Thursday 23 June 2022
There is an overdue payment under your name. Please, settle your debts ASAP!
Sadly, there are some bad news that you are about to hear.
About few months ago I have gained a full access to all devices used by you for internet browsing.
Shortly after, I started recording all internet activities done by you.
Below is the sequence of events of how that happened:
Earlier I purchased from hackers a unique access to diversified email accounts (at the moment, it is really easy to do using internet).
As you can see, I managed to log in to your email account without breaking a sweat: (ugubandubuisi.uguba@blogger.com).
Within one week afterwards, I installed a Trojan virus in your Operating Systems available on all devices that you utilize for logging in your email.
To be frank, it was somewhat a very easy task (since you were kind enough to open some of links provided in your inbox emails).
I know, you may be thinking now that I'm a genius.
With help of that useful software, I am now able to gain access to all the controllers located in your devices (e.g., video camera, keyboard, microphone and others).
As result, managed to download all your photos, personal data, history of web browsing and other info to my servers without any problems.
Moreover, I now have access to all accounts in your messengers, social networks, emails, contacts list, chat history - you name it.
My Trojan virus continues refreshing its signatures in a non-stop manner (because it is operated by driver),
hence it remains undetected by any antivirus software installed in your PC or device.
So, I guess now you finally understand the reason why I could never be caught until this very letter...
During the process of your personal info compilation, I could not help but notice that you are a huge admirer and regular guest of websites with adult content.
You endure a lot of pleasure while checking out porn websites, watching nasty porn movies and reaching breathtaking orgasms.
Let me be frank with you, it was really hard to resist from recording some of those naughty solo scenes with you in main role and compiling them in special videos
that expose your masturbation sessions, which end with you cumming.
In case if you still have doubts, all I need is to click my mouse and all those nasty videos with you will be shared to friends, colleagues, and relatives of yours.
Moreover, nothing stops me from uploading all that hot content online, so all public can watch it too.
I sincerely hope, you would really not prefer that to happen, keeping in mind all the dirty things you like to watch,
(you certainly know what I mean) it will completely ruin your reputation.
However, don't worry, there is still a way to resolve this:
You need to carry out a $1290 USD transfer to my wallet (equivalent amount in bitcoins depending on exchange rate at the moment of funds transfer),
hence upon receiving the transaction, I will proceed with deleting all the filthy videos with you in main role.
Afterwards, we can forget about this unpleasant accident. Furthermore, I guarantee that all the malicious software will also be erased from your devices and accounts.
Mark my words, I never lie.
That is a great bargain with a low price, I assure you, because I have spent a lot of effort while recording
and tracking down all your activities and dirty deeds during a long period of time.
In case if you have no idea how to buy and transfer bitcoins - feel free to check the related info on the internet.
Here is my bitcoin wallet for your reference: 1Mjt2xobFExdZBGfjTVDcgzJWQxRxoHBdA
From now on, you have only 48 hours and countdown has started once you opened this very email (in other words, 2 days).
The following list contains things you should definitely abstain from doing or even attempting:
> Abstain from trying to reply this email (since the email is generated inside your inbox alongside with return address).
> Abstain from trying to call or report to police or any other security services. In addition, it's a bad idea if you want to share it with your friends,
hoping they would help. If I happen to find out (knowing my awesome skills, it can be done effortlessly,
because I have all your devices and accounts under my control and unceasing observation) - kinky videos of yours will be share to public the same day.
> Abstain from trying to look for me - that would not lead anywhere either. Cryptocurrency transactions are absolutely anonymous and cannot be tracked.
> Abstain from reinstalling your OS on devices or throwing them away. That would not solve the problem as well,
since all your personal videos are already uploaded and stored at remote servers.
Things you may be confused about:
> That your funds transfer won't be delivered to me.
Chill, I can track down any transactions right away, so upon funds transfer I will receive a notification as well,
since I still control your devices (my trojan virus has ability of controlling all processes remotely, just like TeamViewer).
> That I am going to share your dirty videos after receiving money transfer from you.
Here you need to trust me, because there is absolutely no point to still bother you after receiving money.
Moreover, if I really wanted all those videos would be available to public long time ago!
I believe we can still handle this situation on fair terms!
Here is my last advice to you... in future you better ensure you stay away from this kind of situations!
My advice - don't forget to regularly update your passwords to feel completely secure.
Friday 24 June 2022
There is an overdue payment under your name. Please, settle your debts ASAP!
Sadly, there are some bad news that you are about to hear.
About few months ago I have gained a full access to all devices used by you for internet browsing.
Shortly after, I started recording all internet activities done by you.
Below is the sequence of events of how that happened:
Earlier I purchased from hackers a unique access to diversified email accounts (at the moment, it is really easy to do using internet).
As you can see, I managed to log in to your email account without breaking a sweat: (ugubandubuisi.uguba@blogger.com).
Within one week afterwards, I installed a Trojan virus in your Operating Systems available on all devices that you utilize for logging in your email.
To be frank, it was somewhat a very easy task (since you were kind enough to open some of links provided in your inbox emails).
I know, you may be thinking now that I'm a genius.
With help of that useful software, I am now able to gain access to all the controllers located in your devices (e.g., video camera, keyboard, microphone and others).
As result, managed to download all your photos, personal data, history of web browsing and other info to my servers without any problems.
Moreover, I now have access to all accounts in your messengers, social networks, emails, contacts list, chat history - you name it.
My Trojan virus continues refreshing its signatures in a non-stop manner (because it is operated by driver),
hence it remains undetected by any antivirus software installed in your PC or device.
So, I guess now you finally understand the reason why I could never be caught until this very letter...
During the process of your personal info compilation, I could not help but notice that you are a huge admirer and regular guest of websites with adult content.
You endure a lot of pleasure while checking out porn websites, watching nasty porn movies and reaching breathtaking orgasms.
Let me be frank with you, it was really hard to resist from recording some of those naughty solo scenes with you in main role and compiling them in special videos
that expose your masturbation sessions, which end with you cumming.
In case if you still have doubts, all I need is to click my mouse and all those nasty videos with you will be shared to friends, colleagues, and relatives of yours.
Moreover, nothing stops me from uploading all that hot content online, so all public can watch it too.
I sincerely hope, you would really not prefer that to happen, keeping in mind all the dirty things you like to watch,
(you certainly know what I mean) it will completely ruin your reputation.
However, don't worry, there is still a way to resolve this:
You need to carry out a $1290 USD transfer to my wallet (equivalent amount in bitcoins depending on exchange rate at the moment of funds transfer),
hence upon receiving the transaction, I will proceed with deleting all the filthy videos with you in main role.
Afterwards, we can forget about this unpleasant accident. Furthermore, I guarantee that all the malicious software will also be erased from your devices and accounts.
Mark my words, I never lie.
That is a great bargain with a low price, I assure you, because I have spent a lot of effort while recording
and tracking down all your activities and dirty deeds during a long period of time.
In case if you have no idea how to buy and transfer bitcoins - feel free to check the related info on the internet.
Here is my bitcoin wallet for your reference: 1Mjt2xobFExdZBGfjTVDcgzJWQxRxoHBdA
From now on, you have only 48 hours and countdown has started once you opened this very email (in other words, 2 days).
The following list contains things you should definitely abstain from doing or even attempting:
> Abstain from trying to reply this email (since the email is generated inside your inbox alongside with return address).
> Abstain from trying to call or report to police or any other security services. In addition, it's a bad idea if you want to share it with your friends,
hoping they would help. If I happen to find out (knowing my awesome skills, it can be done effortlessly,
because I have all your devices and accounts under my control and unceasing observation) - kinky videos of yours will be share to public the same day.
> Abstain from trying to look for me - that would not lead anywhere either. Cryptocurrency transactions are absolutely anonymous and cannot be tracked.
> Abstain from reinstalling your OS on devices or throwing them away. That would not solve the problem as well,
since all your personal videos are already uploaded and stored at remote servers.
Things you may be confused about:
> That your funds transfer won't be delivered to me.
Chill, I can track down any transactions right away, so upon funds transfer I will receive a notification as well,
since I still control your devices (my trojan virus has ability of controlling all processes remotely, just like TeamViewer).
> That I am going to share your dirty videos after receiving money transfer from you.
Here you need to trust me, because there is absolutely no point to still bother you after receiving money.
Moreover, if I really wanted all those videos would be available to public long time ago!
I believe we can still handle this situation on fair terms!
Here is my last advice to you... in future you better ensure you stay away from this kind of situations!
My advice - don't forget to regularly update your passwords to feel completely secure.
Sunday 25 April 2021
Life Reimagined: Coping with Conflict, Canceling Scientists, Rethinking Philanthropy, & Memoir
Hey uguba ndubuisi, hope you're having a relaxing weekend!
Before diving in, I have a small request for help 🙏. I'm collecting testimonials from readers to help spread the word about my work.
If you've benefited from Life Reimagined, my website, or interacting with me in any way, I'd appreciate if you can take 30 seconds to tell me about it.
If you'd like to help out, you can fill out this short form.
Now...this week I'd like to discuss four things – how we can understand and leverage our relationship with conflict, insights from one of the most talented entrepreneurs I know, lessons in writing a memoir, and a rebuttal to the attempted canceling of scientist Richard Dawkins.
🗣 What's your relationship with conflict?
On most occasions, I'm comfortable with conflict. I can give feedback, challenge an idea, negotiate terms, and so on with relative ease.
I don't seek conflict, but I also don't shy away from it. My relationship with conflict has been shaped by at least three pillars – my biology, my childhood experiences, and my philosophy.
Biology: I'm in the ~50th percentile of "agreeableness" per the Big 5 personality test. That means I value getting along with others, but I am also relatively comfortable with challenging people and their thinking.
Childhood Experiences: I grew up in a turbulent household that often featured heated arguments and even physical altercations. Through exposure to conflict, I learned about how conflict can help ease tensions and how people can still love one another even after fighting.
Philosophy: I believe that in life and business, we can all improve and grow. We owe it to ourselves and others to engage in situations that may be uncomfortable and involve conflict if those situations can help foster healthy and productive change.
This philosophy is based on a few core ideas:
- I believe that we need to address problems/frustrations with ourselves and in our relationships when they're small. Otherwise, they can grow much larger and lead to resentment or massive blowups. Resentment and blowups often cause irreparable damage. So I'd rather have an uncomfortable conversation early on than try to bury frustrations that may later balloon into something more destructive.
- I believe that with the right mix of observation, empathy, and compassionate communication, we can deliver and receive messages that help ourselves and others grow. Admittedly, this is a difficult balance to strike, but we can improve this skill like any other skill.
- I believe that learning to engage in healthy conflict is a meta-skill that requires many of the traits I value in people – humility, open-mindedness, empathy, less ego, self-reflection, a penchant for learning, and a willingness to be honest with how little we know.
Now...that's my personal relationship and philosophy with conflict.
What I've learned over the years is that I cannot expect other people to share my beliefs about and relationship with conflict.
In fact, many of my closest friends really dislike conflict. Their beliefs are formed on different pillars, but it's always that the unique mix of their biology, childhood experiences, and philosophies that have led them to different conclusions about conflict than me.
For example, while traveling with my best friend around the world, there were two instances where I got so frustrated that I knocked a box of cereal off the kitchen counter. While I try not to ever let internal frustration turn into physical expressions of frustration, I'm not perfect. These were two instances where I failed to keep my composure.
After the second cereal box incident, my friend was so upset by the event that I thought I might lose him as a friend. From my perspective, I had certainly lost my cool and not acted in calibrated ways, but was this really something to lose a friend over?
Well...he has a very different relationship with conflict.
He grew up in a household where people did not raise their voices, let alone express their frustration in physical ways. The idea that someone like me could lose his temper and slap a box of cereal was an affront to his belief that it's best to remain cool and collected, regardless of how upset you are.
Accepting the gravity of the encounter, I vowed to never knock over a cereal box again. I also learned something about myself and my friend.
Since that encounter, I've realized that the differences in how me and my friend view conflict have led us to have very different approaches to many situations in life and business.
We have diverging approaches in everything from how we think about negotiation, to our willingness to directly challenge people, to the solutions we propose for various problems at work.
How we see conflict is not the only variable driving the differences, but it's a more significant factor than you might expect.
Now, I'm not commenting on who's approach is better or worse. Rather, I'm pointing out that we all have different relationships with conflict that influence how we respond to things that happen in our lives.
I believe our relationship with conflict deeply influences how we feel about certain situations, how we navigate difficulties in relationships, and how we operate in the professional world.
Without understanding our relationship with conflict and how it manifests in specific situations, we're not able to operate at our full potential.
For example, if you're a manager working with someone who is underperforming, your relationship with conflict may affect your approach and ability to address the issue.
If you're a low-conflict person, you may fear giving feedback to this underperforming employee. You want to be liked, and you don't want to deliver bad news, so you might be inclined to avoid the tough conversation and allow the underperformance to continue.
This approach may work out if the employee is self-aware and gets his act together. But it also may lead to the employee never knowing he is underperforming and later being fired unexpectedly without having received the right feedback. I've seen this happen many times.
If, on the other hand, you are more comfortable with conflict, you may come up with a performance improvement plan that addresses the main issues and gives a timeline/resources for solving them. This provides clarity to the employee, and it's up to him to respond appropriately. This approach may backfire if you deliver the message in harsh ways.
In both scenarios, the efficacy of your approach is also related to the employee's relationship with conflict. So you must account for his beliefs as well if you want to maximize the probability of a good outcome.
In life and business, everyone has different natural tendencies, experiences, and philosophies.
This reality is one of the reasons that makes personal and professional relationships so difficult, especially in situations that may involve conflict.
So what can we do to increase the probability that we have healthier interactions with others when there is potential conflict involved?
The first step is self-awareness.
What's your relationship with conflict? How did it form? How does it manifest in different situations? How do your beliefs differ from the beliefs of others? How can you adapt your style for others?
Without self-awareness, we cannot effectively deal with situations that may involve conflict.
Once we understand ourselves, the next step is reflecting on how to approach difficult situations before they actually happen.
I like to use the message, messenger, and receiver framework.
In every difficult conversation, there are three basic elements:
- Message: What you or someone else wants to communicate.
- Messenger: You or whoever is delivering the message.
- Receiver: The person receiving the message.
Imagine that you have some piece of feedback that you want to give to someone else, and you're worried about the potential for conflict. The way to mitigate this risk is to walk through the framework.
For the message, think about what it is that you want to communicate. There are dozens of ways to communicate a message. You can tell a story, be direct, sandwich the idea between other ideas, and so on. You can do it in person, over the phone, or over a beer.
To know what tactic to use, think about what you know about the receiver. What's his relationship with conflict? What are his beliefs? What have you seen work and not work in that past?
Finally, think about the relationship between you – the messenger – and the receiver. Is this your boss or direct report? What does he think about you? What does he think about your intentions?
Armed with this information, you select a path forward. You choose the message, the medium, and the timing.
In some cases, you may even decide to leverage a different messenger.
I've encountered times where I'm not the best messenger for someone because of their relationship with me, their preexisting beliefs about me, past experiences we've had, and so on.
So instead of risking a high-conflict situation that doesn't allow the other person to hear the message, I find a more suitable messenger for relaying the information.
This message, messenger, and receiver framework is not perfect, but it increases the chances that we have productive interactions with others that move all of us in the right direction.
Remember, the goal is not to be right or to change people.
It's to cultivate healthy interactions with the people we love, to get more out of our personal and professional lives, and to help others along the way.
I'll leave you with a question.
How can you better understand and leverage your relationship with conflict to enrich your life and the lives of the people around you?
👨💻 Interview with Entrepreneur Dror Liebenthal
I recently interview Dror Liebenthal, the the ambitious CEO of Bold.org who is reimagining the world of philanthropy.
I first met Dror at Princeton University in 2011. Since then, we've worked together at three companies, traveled to 10+ countries, and helped each other grow as people and professionals.
Over the years, I've been impressed with how Dror has systematically prioritized learning and applied first principles thinking to his decision-making processes.
Dror has also rapidly ascended in the world of startups. He's now one of the best startup operators, builders, and leaders I know.
What's awesome about Dror is that he's applying his intelligence, expertise, and tenacity to solving hard problems that improve the quality of people's lives at scale.
Along the way, he continues to be a compassionate person, a man of integrity, a wonderful friend, and someone who values family.
I'm thrilled to share my interview with Dror in which he discusses his life story, most valuable habits, leadership lessons, and how he's disrupting the world of philanthropy with Bold.org.
👉 Life Reimagined Insights with Entrepreneur Dror Liebenthal
I hope you enjoy getting to know Dror – he's awesome!
✍️ The Art of Memoir
I recently published my notes for Mary Karr's The Art of Memoir. If you're an aspiring nonfiction writer, this book is full of useful gems.
A few of the key takeaways you'll learn about in my notes:
- The relationship between experience and truth
- How to develop a voice that resonates
- Using transformation as an organizing principle
- How to deal with the people you write about
- What to do when you're stuck
You can access all of my notes from her book with Foundations, which is the growing digital library where I publish key takeaways from all the best books I've read. It recently crossed 100 book notes published!
Use the code lrcommunity for 20% off at checkout.
👨🔬 The World of Canceling Academics
The American Humanist Association recently revoked its 1996 AHA Humanist of the Year award from scientist Richard Dawkins over some Tweets that he recently made.
While I believe people should be accountable for wrongdoing and harming others, this situation is one of the increasing number of examples I've seen of organizations going too far in discrediting someone based on subjective interpretations of a sentence or two of a lifetime of work.
If you're not familiar with the situation, I encourage you to read about it, form your own opinions, and check out Steven Pinker and Rebecca's Goldstein's response to the AHA protesting the decision.
April 21st 2021
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P.S. 🙏 If you enjoy Life Reimagined or any of my work, consider becoming one of my monthly paid supporters. You can start with as little as $2.99/month. Every contribution helps me continue to expand my work.
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Thanks for tuning in, and see you in two weeks.
Cheers,
Cal
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